Shhh… Brooklyn Black Ops

I’m bringing you all this information at a possible risk to my life.  I’m going to tell you about a beer that does not exist, at least according to the brewery.  Lets say that a bourbon-barrel aged Russian Imperial Stout called “Black Ops” does exist, despite the hard line from supposed creators.  Let’s suppose that the label reads something like this;

Brooklyn Black Ops does not exist. However, if it did exist, it would be a robust stout concocted by the Brooklyn brewing team under cover of secrecy and hidden from everyone else at the brewery. Supposedly “Black Ops” was aged for four months in bourbon barrels, bottled flat, and re-fermented with Champagne yeast, creating big chocolate and coffee flavors with a rich underpinning of vanilla-like oak notes. They say there are only 1,000 cases. We have no idea what they’re talking about.

Again, this beer (officially, at least) doesn’t exist.  So you didn’t hear from me that starting on February 1st, cases should be arriving to Whole Foods, RSVP, Downeast Beverage, Novare Res and the Great Lost Bear in Portland.  I definitely won’t be picking up a bottle or two next week and won’t be drinking it with my friends.  If you know what’s good for you, I suggest you do the same.

I don’t know what kind of toughs brewmaster Garrett Oliver has working for him, but I have a feeling that it wouldn’t take them long to disappear a bookselling geek in Maine.  If I don’t post again soon, you can assume the worst and toast me off with an awesome local beer.

Or I was too lazy to post.  But let’s assume the first scenario – it’s much more exciting.


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